9.29.2010

a funny joke . thanks scott lol .


Joe took his blind date to the carnival. "What would you like to do first, Kim?" asked Joe.

"I want to get weighed," she said. They ambled over to the weight guesser. He guessed 120 pounds. She got on the scale; it read 117 and she won a prize.

Next, the couple went on the Ferris Wheel. When the ride was over, Joe again asked Kim what she would like to do.

"I want to get weighed," she said.

Back to the weight guesser they went. Since they had been there before, he guessed her correct weight, and Joe lost his dollar.

The couple walked around the carnival and again he asked where to next. "I want to get weighed," she responded.

By this time, Joe figured she was really weird and took her home early, dropping her off with a handshake.

Her roommate, Laura, asked her about the blind date, "How'd it go?"

Kim responded, "Oh, Waura, it was wousy."

* just think about it ; lol my friends didnt get it the first time , smh .

9.27.2010

check the 'other' box ?


before color wheels of skin complexion .
before genitalia stigmas .
before 'declined' & 'approved' worries ...

is a heartbeat that skips into and out of the planes of humanity . regardless of the places we come from, the battles of the sexes, and cultures we derive from, it is important to recognize that we are human first . i attend a Historically Black College (which usually acts as fertilizer to reap the sprouting speculations of society). nevertheless, my matriculation through Spelman has given me a better perspective on the concept of human existence than ever before .

we often claim that we do not want to be labeled. psh, "labels" are the cornerstone & comfort zone of mankind . cool kids . nerds . athlete . Black. Asian. Vegetarian. Metrosexual. Muslim. Negro. Irish. pretty. intellectual. rich. lower class. 'Artsy'. blonds & brunettes. Ghetto. Christian (and all fifty thousand protestant categories that fall in line). we construct our lives on the basis of these labels ... because everyone wants a sense of
B E L O N G I N G .

I'm not saying it's wrong to identify with groups, i am saying however ... that we need to understand the worth and value behind every eye, heart, and voice . behind that red dot on a forehead, FUBU sweatshirt, bra, mustache, or pair of shades is a human . keep that in mind .

"If each man or woman could understand that every other human life is as full of sorrows, or joys, or base temptations, or heartaches and of remorse as his own ... how much kinder, how much gentler he would be" -William Allen White

9.23.2010

pouring out the last drops .

we just sit in puddles of hope
& pray that it won't drown us while we sleep .
and we pray for sanity as a parting gift to keep ...

Today, mrs. harper said that her daughter got into a car accident (just following her sickness that has her feeble) . she proclaimed, "i know they say that 'God won't put more on you than you can bear.' Well, I'm honored that God thinks so highly of me and my family ."

we swim within the waves of worry -
we seem to panic and gasp for air
wanting someone -ANYONE to hear us up there ...

Keyona found out that a guy that she was dating has a girlfriend back home . a girlfriend with a swollen womb that will POP come spring . she sighed, "i cried . not because he was an asshole ... but because i'm not sure if men are hopeless cases."

we micromanage our lives
because we know this life is quick,
fine-tuning every bolt, so the rusted ones can tick ...

I'm currently typing in my apartment lobby across from a young man . he has a full beard & mustache, but is also wearing a lace front wig . i guess times are changing ?

...but time won't change everything.

like that nostalgic tingling in my tummy ...
that i HATE .
& want to slit my stomach so the butterflies can fly away .
'cause i'm not who i was this time last year -
and i'm grateful for the people who love me
& still crave to be here ...

9.22.2010

hugo bossin' . ♥


where steez meets intellect .
where sandpaper wonders across velvet .
that is you're waiting room .
"thanks for waiting, i'll be right with you shortly"
i'm not even shallow, but swag. baby, swag -
& im slipping through the slits of your eyes .

quite frankly, they make my inner chaos still .
oh, those windows ;
those slanted, dark brown windows that could bend brick houses if they wanted to .
thank God you had mercy on me .

those heavy eyes;
piercing . prying . and poking fun at my veiled heart .
you find my curtain humorous- you can still see my silhouetted soul .
not much is left to the imagination,
but i hold up my veil just in case .

& you listen hard to the sound in my lace delicates .
your imagination sinks down in my Levi dukes .
you peep the fly in my fingers ...
but dig my values even more -
ain't that what we want ?
insight into our inner ticking clocks ?

"Wild Young Hearts" - Noisettes

And while the city sleeps
I won't weep because I didn't keep
My boyfriend and the summer's here again
And the leaves are golden
Under the grand silver birch tree

While we're thinking bout the people we meet
Dancing feet, wasters on the cover of a magazine
People you've kissed, people you lust
And the one's that you might not
Ever remember what's the use

I'm not what I was last summer
Not who I was in the spring
Tell me, tell me, tell me when will we learn
We love it and we leave it and we watch it burn
Damn these wild young hearts
Damn these wild young hearts


Now that the city's awake, my heart aches
Oh what a silly mistake it seems I've made
You left your keys under my bed
Left a thumpin in my head
I would say sorry, what's the use

Cause, I'm not what I was last September
And I don't wear the same robes in May
We know we shouldn't do it, but we do it anyway
We know we might regret it but it seemed okay
Damn this wild young heart
Damn this wild young heart
Damn this wild young heart

If now is forever then what's to prove
Cause it won't be the same next summer
And I guess I'll see you in the spring
Somebody tell me, tell me, tell me, when will I learn
I love it and I leave it and I watch it burn
Damn this wild young heart
I told you damn this wild young heart
Damn this wild young
Tell me, tell me, tell me when will I learn
Damn this wild young heart



-----

there's a fine line between music & poetry ...


9.21.2010

Oh, Langston .

"Island"

Wave of sorrow,
Do not drown me now:

I see the island
Still ahead somehow.

I see the island
And its sands are fair:

Wave of sorrow,
take me there.



"Advice"

Folks, I'm telling you,
birthing is hard
and dying is mean,
so get yourself
a litte loving
in between .


- youre welcome :)

9.16.2010

and ... scene !


stevi:
i dont need a serial lover man :
googley-eyed, stunted-at-growth, shallow love is banned .
tired of men 'falling in love' right after lunch or dinner,
these big ego-souled, midget mind, hacking-heart killers .

creeping in our windows and marking up their space,
tip-toeing in and out of bed just for a little taste .
they lose their minds along the grind & say that theyre 'in love'
but with whom ? susie? sally? jane? ... or all of thee above .

ladies: you're disposable. it's sad, but often true .
although he says you're "different", he's said it to a few .
find a man who sticks around & puts forward his best toes .
unwavering love is pure in substance, a cryptonite for woes .

[curtain close]

epilogue:

women, stray from serial lovers . they are obsessed with the "idea of love", but hardly know what it is . love is not only a feeling, but it is a verb . half of the time, men will say it ... but be in "love" with someone else just as easy . that's not love . although this is not the most convenient method, time & actions will tell if someone really loves you . [i know some men are upset ... cool lol . this one isn't for you ... ]

thanks charnelle .

I'm not much of a 'Tyler Perry enthusiast' , but this seems like a movie that would dig deep in souls . I'm looking forward to this :

9.14.2010

"quote, end quote"

"let's talk this over ... it's not like we're dead ." - avril lavigne


just take two minutes and dwell on that quote ; HEAVY right ? unless we're exhaling our last breaths, there's no reason why we should not be saying, feeling, and acting on what we want . there should be no unresolved issues or grudges held (if you dont want there to be) .

So why cant you address this ? it's not like you're dead .

9.13.2010

pink doves .

DEAR MOM,

i have your smile .
your hips .
your thin frame .
your facial expressions .
your apparent disdain for diminishable things .

- beyond it all, i think i'm coming to have your peace of mind . thank you for all that you've given me . all of the advice, foundation, unconditional love, encouragement, honesty & guidance . you are loved & missed more & more each day . HAPPY BIRTHDAY MOMMY :]

9.09.2010

'how to love unconditionally' by stevi ♥



1. be patient . when you love someone, they will not be perfect . they might have some insecurities . they might sing the wrong lyrics to your favorite songs. you're significant other might pick at your plate of food [*see kevin hart's seriously funny for more info lol] . they might wear a busted pair of holey-shoes that you cant stand !!they may chew with their mouth open ... that's just bad home trainin' aha . at the end of the day, you aren't perfect either and sometimes you have to take some bad if you have an amazing person on your arm that 'gets you' and understands you .

2. communicate . if something is bothering you, let it out ! dont let things build up and then all of a sudden you wanna strangle him cause he left the milk on the counter lol . you look crazy & then he's sleeping with one eye open . it's weird & awkward i'm sure . on a serious note, open up to the person that you love . you may not know it, but they may feel the exact same way you do about a situation . it's much easier to say, "i love you so much" than it is, "you really hurt me when ..."

3. forgive . if men are men, and women are women ... someone's gunna hurt the other person . now, my friend got mad at me and said, "I REFUSE TO EXCEPT THAT ! WHY DO WE HAVE TO ANTICIPATE BEING HURT??" after i told her to chill out & stop screaming (lol)... i tried to explain . im not condoning cheating on a loved one & hurting someone is not always directly correlated to 'cheating' (excuse my extremely formal tone here) . hurting can be lying, or being deceitful, or cursing or whateverrrr . im just saying, if the person is worthy of your love, you can try your best to forgive and move on .

4. selflessness . OMG i cannot stress this enough . we have to sacrifice for the ones we love . here's the crazy part, we shouldn't mind because ultimately, we want to see the other person to be HAPPY ! now, hopefully the same thing is reciprocated from your partner (you dont want someone who simply takes and takes) & that results in a beautiful relationship . being generous, thoughtful and considerate is the ultimate way to display love .

5. lastly, God is love . it takes hard work to love someone unconditionally . when they hurt you or fall short of expectations ... you feel like things are impossible . however, if God is present in the relationship ... any bruise can be healed and any harm can be undone :) even circumstances that seem too crazy, they are mended through Jesus . I have learned so much about what it means to LOVE: through observation, advice, the bible & even personal experiences . of course i dont know it all, and who am i to advise you all ? lol ... but hey, i wish the best for all those couples out there & im hoping this helps !

-Stevi Renee , XoXo

9.08.2010

i can digg it .

uhmmmm . i LOVE this song [for so many reasons] . it seems like everyone can relate in some way or another ...and if not, i still think trey did a great job with the song . the video is cool, but it's undeniable that trey trey is a sight for sore eyes :] enjoy !


9.07.2010

i dont know why i chose this cheesy picture .



well, sometimes i forget that this is MY blog and that i can actually post about whatever i want lol . i usually post works of writing, videos, poems, or social commentary ... and sometimes i forget that this is from my perspective . so: RECAP ;
i am back at Spelman (truly and only by the grace of God). it feels so strange to be a junior on campus this year . i remember moving to atlanta and being ter-ri-fied out of my mind lol . i didn't know where to go, what not to do, what to eat, who to trust ... i literally knew NO ONE in my year . things have really changed for me over the course of two years and some months . im now living in an apartment with my friend and with no meal plan (holla at ya starving college student lol) *sidebar: if you see me and i look evil, its only because i havent eaten yet ...i tend to get grumpy sorry lol ... anyway, im finding money for my college tuition & living expenses on my own, officially .

God has brought some amazing people into my life who have helped me, encouraged me, and inspired me to make the word "impossible" a foreign concept . im hungry for my education now . im anxious for future life experiences & spiritual success (ill elaborate some other time). i let go of stress, drama, any past animosity, and im open to every new possibility . whatever i go through from this point on will be counted all joy . it will simply be a building block towards my perseverance & character . my mind & soul are renewed . with that being said, i apologize to my consistent blog readers for my slow-post habits these days . due to work load, newspaper articles, and occasional sleep ... i'm short on time . i'm still posting , hang in there with me !

all my love,
stevi renee

death to bubblegum poems .

"They Went Home" by Maya Angelou

They went home and told their wives,
that never once in all their lives,
had they known a girl like me,
But... They went home.

They said my house was licking clean,
no word I spoke was ever mean,
I had an air of mystery,
But... They went home.

My praises were on all men's lips,
they liked my smile, my wit, my hips,
they'd spend one night, or two or three.
But...

9.05.2010

re-post from february

"A is for Almost"

"im selfish , impatient, and a little insecure . i make mistakes . i am out of control and at times hard to handle . but if you cant handle me at my worst then you sure as hell don't deserve me at my best ." - Marylin Monroe .






if anything , i have learned one, vital lesson .
find a person who sees the worth in you , so much in fact, that they are willing . someone willing to deal with the hard times because your worth could never be appraised . someone who is willing to stand by you because they cant see it any other way .

9.02.2010

you are appreciated .

"I have the nerve to walk my own way, however hard, in my search for reality, rather than climb upon the rattling wagon of wishful illusions."
- Zora Neale Hurston .

My freshman year, i came into Morehouse with a weird look on my face ... one of confusion, boredom, and a drop of bewilderment lol . They were so different from the men that i was accustomed to and i felt like i was in a foreign land lol . Well let me be the first to say that i'd be happy to choke on the criticism that i hurled into the campus of Morehouse College .

I took a stroll through Morehouse today and i swear my eyelids were taped to my forehead with astonishment . Dont get me wrong, there are still a lot of pretentious and lame guys across the way... yet and still, i saw some of my same 'kucklehead' friends(as my dad would call them) from Freshmen year and how they have matured . They have goals, they have confidence, they have more self-respect & really... just on their grown man tip. Fellas, it's appreciated lol . Morehouse really does focus on the five pillars of their institution: Well spoken, Well traveled, Well read, Well dressed & Well balanced. In these last two years alone, i have noticed men in leadership positions, creating organizations, helping the less fortunate, and confident individualism . Sad to say, that is a hard thing to come across in other places throughout the United States .

Unfortunately, a LARGE amount of young, black men shy away from the forefront of leadership and responsibility. But somehow, we as women are expected to let these same men 'lead our households and families'. Into where might i ask? poverty? ignorance? materialism? the 50's? [smh] ... I love men who can take charge and I love men who I can trust to lead if I need to be led (not to mention a man who can clean up nicely). Im just shouting out the men IN GENERAL who have goals and see the world in a bigger scope ... bigger than the limitations, discrimination, haters, hoods and barriers in your way . What can i say? I love black men :)

9.01.2010

understand me :



forgive me.

perhaps my mind is different- but i have come to the conclusion that life is so much bigger than me and you . i cant focus on the drama of 'He said & She said..." . I wont dwell on things that went wrong . I cant worry about competing with other women . i cannot give energy to the love of money & 'fitting in' ... all of those things are perishable and a complete waste of time . it's so self-centered, trivial and distracting .


the media spends so much time constructing your ideas of "desire" and manipulating your idea of who you want to be . they make you believe that their product is all about you ... that it's about bettering you ! they want youuu to have better hair, cooler clothes, smoother legs, less wrinkles, faster legs, better intimacy in bed, more expensive cars, eating healthier, have bigger boobs, and better experiences . in all actuality, it's about buying their CEO's new beach home in Fiji and buying their brand new rolex . it's so easy to fall into that trap ... trust me, i fall victim to it all the time (but im working on it lol) .


All we do is become narcissistic ; honestly, what good ever came from that ? you always here, ""all that matters is what's on the inside" and we roll our eyes in unison . yet, on a romantic level - who wants a relationship with a man who's caught up in "f*ck b*tches, get money" & the next 'function' for the weekend ? who wants relationships that are based more on the perception of having a girlfriend than a connection ? who wants a girl who spends more time in the mirror than she spends time getting to know you ? i simply need more . & im seeing the world in a bigger scope ...


people living in poverty across the globe, but more rich in character and generosity than anyone in the U.S. People that can honestly boast that they are who they are because of their foundation (and not because of what their friends will think) . in different parts of the world, men want women for more than sex . out in other countries, people aren't worried about getting tinted windows put on their impalas & being "the baddest b*tch" . in other places, their are people who are so spiritual that they can feel the tears of God ...



i guess ... things are changing .