beating down adversity.

I got a call last night that really tore me up. The person on the other end of the phone sounded so broken and weak. I use that last adjective with caution, but it's accurate nonetheless. See, i can sympathize with tears, frustration, or anger. I cannot, however, understand how you decide to stop pushing. I have seen too many people that I love fight for their livelihood to understand the justification of “giving up”. Weakness is a luxury reserved for people who have nothing left to lose. Weakness is not something that you can shake off like a common cold. It sits in your pores and infects the mind and soul. Weakness is a disease.

[I was talking to a friend of mine and she told me about a guy she’s dating. She said one of the most attractive things about him is that he’s a provider & protector. She said that she could see him being an amazing father and husband because he is too driven and strong to let his loved ones starve. He had a hunger to keep pushing and that made her feel "safe".]

I think a lot of women still want that out of a man- and rightfully so. Strength means so much more than lifting weights or a fist. Strength means getting back up again, because you have mouths to feed and dreams to nourish. Strength means standing firm in the belief of God’s grace. Personally, life has tried me and this has caused me to acquire a thirst for survival.  Subsequently, I look for that same quality in a guy. Because quite frankly, there are too many men trying to lead a household and relationship when they’re lost in the dark themselves.

Look, life will try to beat on you. From school, careers, funny money, family, disease and death. That’s not going to change.  You have to adapt. There are only two options when approaching adversity: One, you submit to the beating and adopt the role of “victim” -freezing up like a deer caught in headlights and hoping for the best in a trying situation. Two, you can learn from life’s tactics and…become stronger. Like any basketball team or professional fighter, you need to study your opponents before you can truly know how to beat them. Learn how to maneuver throughout life instead of letting it toss you around like a rag doll.

If you are “fortunate” to never experience real hardship, then I tip my hat to you. Nevertheless, to the other ninety-nine percent of us … align yourself with God and keep pushing. We are not strong enough to do it on our own. Yet, if we remain hopeful in God's ability then things will happen.

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