chunky hearts .

"I hated to think of him smiling unless he was smiling at me. His grins were too precious to be wasted on ordinary mortals, especially women ."

Love is a simplistic something that S T R O K E S your inhibitions until they purr in solitude . She is the mother that births comfort-covered smiles . she is a farmer, raking the soil of our soul and pushing down seeds of ecstasy. love massages our shoulders until the knots of worry disintegrate into thin air . speaking of thin, love is not . Love is thick like wet, Georgia air in the midmost of May . it is Martin .

"Really, i never had occasion to doubt his sincerity, but i used to drag my heart over hot coals by supposing. I did not know i could suffer so ."

Love is a complicated something that let's you walk on solid ground and then pulls you by the ankles when you least expect it . She is R U T H L E S S, love that is . She is a racially ambiguous nymph that lures you in with sweet songs of bliss and passion ... then snaps your body into two . Love is a bear trap that you see and frolic in anyway . Love is ... pain painted in mascara . it is Malcolm .

"We were still in the toils and after all my agony, I found out that he was a sucker for me, and he found out that i was in his bag ."

Love is esteemed in the bible for a reason . Love is to mankind what a vibrant, plump balloon is to a toddler ... so precious, so majestic and yet so fragile . It is a thumbprint, specific for each heart and never duplicated twice . It is rain to the drought-stricken, but capable of flood . It is vitamin A, C, and ME to the mal-nourished and sick ... although some are allergic . Like black waves, it is beautiful in its prime but dangerous in it's possibility ... proceed with caution . Love is ultimately of God .

* inspired by Wale's 'Mixtape about Nothing' & quoted from Zora Neale Hurston's 'Dust Tracks on a Road' .

#TOYOTA WIN . [lmfbo]

okay, maybe i just have a really dumb sense of humor . i really dont know ... but uhmmm . . . either way, i laughed lol . ENJOY (:

a pile of pauses .

He said, "am i gonna talk to you tonight?"

and i paused before i answered .

he didn't seem to notice .

but why should he ?
a pause is just a pause . a small little breath taken in to find some words . right ? wrong .

a pause is more than a coincidence of sentence . a pause is a huge thing filled and overflowing with implications, possibilities, and things unsaid .

a pause can be the time needed to respond with a witty reply .

a pause can be the time to make up a lie . obligations, expectations, hopes and faith is poured on us like molten lava ... burning what we think we're capable of; we look in that moment of nothingness for an escape ... a key hole of possibility to avoid the situation .

a pause can be the leash we need to hold back wild tears .

a pause can the time allotted ...to gather the pieces of yourself... just enough of yourself to tell a hurtful confession of truth to a loved one .

a pause can be a thought: the fantasy of hands pressing against flesh in a warm mess of passion . pauses that are taken to give us enough time to smirk . lips that press firmly against one another so steamy words cannot leak out into the world .

a pause can hold the laughs that are SO INTENSE that no sound comes out for the first 3 seconds .

mmm yes . a pause can be a time to weigh options . sitting in your room listening to music and wondering where this can go . an imaginary moment that manipulates you into believing that you can actually control fate . a moment of fake control ... like you can actually predict what will happen if you say, "yes" or "uhm, naw im going to bed." a pause to think, 'whats the worse that can happen?'

. . . a pause that is bold enough to answer your question & change everything .

S O P H O [cant wait for] M O R E .

Well, as this semester comes to an end ...
i guess it's time to reflect on my Sophomore Year here at Spelman .

"SHEEEEEEESH !"

that's all .


lol , naw im playin . People say that Sophomore year is the hardest year of Spelman (although who ever said that was probably a Sophomore) . This year was challenging in so many ways and i actually don't have much to show for it . No awards, no trophies, no certificates, ... 2 scars on my elbows if that counts lol . Everything that i gained this year has been internal . I have met some people that truly pushed me to be a better me . Friends who told me when i was wrong, encouraged me to want better for myself, and entertained my long, dense thoughts at 2AM . Im finally confident in pursuing my career goals and im determined to get the most out of life .

Personally, i have learned about my weaknesses and flaws . I had to face them head on & address them this past school year . My past caught up to me in ways that i did not think possible, but i was able to find the good in the bad . I dealt with the weakening and strengthening of relationships around me . I met people who taught me to think differently about ... everything .I LOVED. I HATED. I found a nice little nook in between . Most importantly, i found that the one thing that was consistent throughout this year was GOD . With all of the Joy and pain, ups and downs, triumphs and failures, God remained firm by my side .

synopsis? we had bad times: low funds, dangerous situations, ridiculous professors, chi-burnt feet, tears, anxiety, weight gain [lol], sloppy moments and all of the above. we had good times: church, shopping, 10 pg paper all time record [pow! lol], homecoming 2009, roaming downtown ATL, hump wednesdays, 3am conversations, freestylin' at BY's, sitting in the lobby of the theaters, vibin; BTW, see 'kick ass' lol... anywho, it was all good .

yeaup, im a rising Junior :)

mm hmm .