i'm N0T her .

I Swear ,
this life would be so funny if it weren't mine to deal with lol .

i woke up this morning in an unconventional place & way, with the sun on my face . and when i feel sexy with a lust in my chest, i curl my hair . i sit in front of the mirror, take strand by strand and let the locks bounce across my shoulder -- i dont curl every time, but it's a tendency of mine .

& i know what i'm saying sounds random, but right now it is all that makes perfect sense to me . yea, i missed these curls .

** i promised something to myself today . i will always keep in mind how short life can be.

1. i will feel no discomfort [i will not be held hostage to my fears and thoughts, nor circumstances .] i will express myself ! if someone asks me how i feel about something, me, you ... i owe it to myself to be honest and liberated .

2. i will not tippy-toe through days . there's no time nor room for my inhibitions . when i see an opportunity, it's mine . i will make decisions and live with the consequences ...i will have the prize of blame or credit (either way, i wont leave empty-handed).

3. i will not answer to anyone . this life is too spiritual and invigorating to be smashed down by people's perceptions, masks, and desires for me . i will love, freely without strain & be open with the risk of emotional infection . i wouldn't trade my past for anything -- it was full of laughs, tears, and security . im also open to possibilities in the now because the three distinctions of time are not as 'black and white' as we make them . ultimately, im taking what's mine .