A friend of mine is going through some serious pre-marital baby fever . she's super excited to have a kid one day . the cuddling of the infant in her arms . holding the toddler's hand as they walk through the mall . the first time their kid says, "mama" . you know, the typical stuff . But then we got to wondering, why do we want kids ?
I'm not asking in a, "i don't like kids, don't wanna have some" type of a way. i mean, why does society need to want to have kids ? my friend suggested that it's strictly for selfish reasons , "we don't HAVE to make babies . there are plenty of babies out there without family's that need a good home ..." and she's right . we make babies because we want to create a life that was once a part of us . A father wants to continue his legacy . A mother wants to be able to say, "that is my blood ... i did that" . Bringing a life into the world is a huge deal, and although some people take it lightly, we all have an instinct to make more of ourselves .
But why not adopt ?
There are so many babies that have no home, food, shelter, livelihood . They have no one to call family , and as much as i can appreciate all the white actors going over to save the 'savage' babies in Africa and Asia [and make it look like a pity, exotic trend] , their are plenty needy children here . If we can (hypothetically speaking) afford to take care of the six kids we want in the future . . . why not adopt one and put he or she in the equation ?
I always admired my grandparents for having foster children . Ever since i can remember, two or three teenage girls have been living in my nana's house . Some were troubled, looking for some guidance . Some would cause problems and fight with my grandparents .Some were great, so thankful to be a part of a big family that embraced them (i always called them my cousins... if they were black, Latina, whatever . and i'd look at someone crazy of they told me otherwise .) I think it's even more courageous to take a person in when they're in the most confused part of their life (adolescence) . It's a big job, but my grandparents are generous & kind & caring .
I say all of this to open a window . In the Black community especially, adoption is such a foreign option when it comes to parenthood . I think it's perfectly normal to want to make a life with your spouse . i would also suggest that we start to consider the less fortunate lives who had no choice about the life they were given . Babies cant help it that their parents died, or are in jail, or strung out somewhere . They are simply living, breathing innocence . They deserve warmth, love, wisdom & they deserve YOU too .
I'm not asking in a, "i don't like kids, don't wanna have some" type of a way. i mean, why does society need to want to have kids ? my friend suggested that it's strictly for selfish reasons , "we don't HAVE to make babies . there are plenty of babies out there without family's that need a good home ..." and she's right . we make babies because we want to create a life that was once a part of us . A father wants to continue his legacy . A mother wants to be able to say, "that is my blood ... i did that" . Bringing a life into the world is a huge deal, and although some people take it lightly, we all have an instinct to make more of ourselves .
But why not adopt ?
There are so many babies that have no home, food, shelter, livelihood . They have no one to call family , and as much as i can appreciate all the white actors going over to save the 'savage' babies in Africa and Asia [and make it look like a pity, exotic trend] , their are plenty needy children here . If we can (hypothetically speaking) afford to take care of the six kids we want in the future . . . why not adopt one and put he or she in the equation ?
I always admired my grandparents for having foster children . Ever since i can remember, two or three teenage girls have been living in my nana's house . Some were troubled, looking for some guidance . Some would cause problems and fight with my grandparents .Some were great, so thankful to be a part of a big family that embraced them (i always called them my cousins... if they were black, Latina, whatever . and i'd look at someone crazy of they told me otherwise .) I think it's even more courageous to take a person in when they're in the most confused part of their life (adolescence) . It's a big job, but my grandparents are generous & kind & caring .
I say all of this to open a window . In the Black community especially, adoption is such a foreign option when it comes to parenthood . I think it's perfectly normal to want to make a life with your spouse . i would also suggest that we start to consider the less fortunate lives who had no choice about the life they were given . Babies cant help it that their parents died, or are in jail, or strung out somewhere . They are simply living, breathing innocence . They deserve warmth, love, wisdom & they deserve YOU too .
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